Health Nazis

artist rendition of a speaker at a podium

A guest article by Jay Werbinox Taylor about smoking laws (April 29, 2005)

Fresh from his crusade against smoking, a mayor from a small town in Georgia has decided to tackle the next great evil – caffeine!

With all of the things we Americans are supposed to be fearful of, from Terrorism and Nuclear Proliferation, to Global Warming and some future asteroid strike, now we are supposed to worry about our two cups of morning coffee? Sorry, Mr. Mayor, but many of us are not puritans, and we have no wish to be.

One has to wonder if this is all really about health, or if it is about something else.

We are right now in the midst of a public health crisis that threatens the future of our entire country - a pandemic of politicians, bureaucrats, and government figureheads spawning ordinances and legislation designed to control every aspect of our lives. Fueling this wildfire of expanding government control is a raging herd mentality that aims for nothing less than having everyone conform to a narrow and singular idea of what a citizen is, and should be. Welcome to new Fascist America, where everyone had better be on the same page! Lest anyone laugh at me for being paranoid, I must point out that totalitarian movements always utilize a strong group spirit in order to pressure the recalcitrant into lock step behind a "common vision", and its proponents always claim to know what is best for us. It is not a mystery that the mass beheadings of the French Revolution were conducted by a group that called itself The Committee for Public Safety.

Yet that was then and this is now, and what we have in America today is a secret political party that crosses partisan boundaries. Some might call it the Nanny Party, though I do not, for that term has been overused. I prefer to call it the Mother Hen Party. I mean no disrespect to the sacred role of motherhood, nor to hens for that matter, but when it comes to politics a catchy name is necessary to attract attention. The Mother Hen Party has an agenda, and if you stick around long enough, you might get to see it unfold. Their attack against smoking continues unabated, and soon you might get fined or even lose your job if you smoke in your own home, especially if someone reports you for smoking in front of your children. Speaking of children, laws will be passed to limit what they can eat, how much soda they can drink, how much TV they can watch, and how much they are allowed to weigh. If you as a parent do not follow these laws you may get fined, and be forced to attend state mandated counseling sessions. The government just has your children's welfare at heart, and who can oppose that? In case you think that you yourself are off the hook, think again, for if a neighbor thinks you might have added on a few too many pounds, a quick call can lead to a visit from the health police, who will issue you an obesity warning. Later, after everyone has gotten used to this intrusion, the Mother Hen Party will add teeth to the law which will call for fines and a brief stay in a state mandated fitness camp....and oh, yeah, caffeine intake must be targeted as well. Get ready for the media barrage advocating only one cup of coffee a day, followed by new laws that fine coffee shop owners who serve any customer more than the legal limit of two.

Gadz! Is anyone else sick of these finger wagging moralistic scarecrows? Am I the only one who is ready to take up smoking just to have the thrill of blowing smoke into a health Nazi's face? What happened to the good ol' spirit of American rebellion? Whatever happened to the concept of freedom, self government, and personal responsibility? What happened to the common sense that inspires an American to laugh at the very notion of a politician telling us how we should live, and what we should eat and drink?

In the spirit of American defiance I propose that we contrarians should smoke on every single anti smoking day, eat meat during every vegan week, and drink an extra cup of Joe in honor of our Mayor. Better yet, let us invent a new day of recognition. How about a National Leave-Me-Alone-and-Worry-About-Your-Own-Self Day? Or even better, a National Shut-Up-and-Mind-Your-Own-Damn-Business-Day!

We can throw a parade, and I for one will be at the front. I hope I am not alone.

Jay Werbinox Taylor

Also see Tobacco Taxation and Constitutional Rights (3 part series)
Also see Cigarette taxes in Arizona and the unjustness of proposition 203
Also see Arizona Minority Rights Initiative
Also see The Inherent Dangers of Majority Rule
Also see Where to buy cigarettes… smokers fighting back
For a related article, see Understanding Freedom… man's conceptual paradox
For another related article, see A Trap Awaits the Politically Correct
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Last modified: 06/22/10